February 29, 2024 - 7:00pm

→ Britons want to destigmatise prostitution… sort of

Britons think prostitution should be destigmatised. They just don’t want to be friends with prostitutes, and they certainly don’t want their children to enter the field, a new YouGov poll found.

Just over half said it should be legal to pay and be paid for sex, and roughly the same proportion of respondents said prostitution shouldn’t be stigmatised. Meanwhile, 77% would be upset if their child became a stripper, and 85% said the same about their child becoming a prostitute. Only 6% were willing to enter a relationship with a prostitute, and 41% were willing to be friends with a prostitute. Men, in their generosity, were markedly more likely than women to say they’re willing to befriend prostitutes and strippers.

→ Trump’s surprise spoiler?

No Labels has become something of an electoral bogeyman for the Left, who worry the group will run a spoiler third party candidate against Joe Biden. It’s inspired a number of legal challenges (a “conspiracy”, if you ask Bill Barr) from Democrat-aligned operatives seeking to keep the group from gaining ballot access.

But those fears were all for naught: the group will decide “shortly after Super Tuesday” whether to move forward with putting a presidential candidate on the ballot, per New York Mag. All eyes turn to Nikki Haley, who’s staying in the race until Super Tuesday, when she’s expected to take a clobbering.

The longshot Trump challenger, if she runs third-party, will be blocked from ballots in the eight states with “sore loser” laws. But Haley’s accession to the general election ballot in any state — and No Labels has ballot access in 16 of them — could finally bring some drama to the so-far predictable fight between two incumbents. “Don’t wear them unless you can run in them”, she once said of her five-inch heels. Time will tell if Haley can keep running. 

→ Wonka goes to Glasgow

The internet is awash with clips about “Willy’s Chocolate Experience,” a £35 event in Glasgow billed as an “immersive experience” which in reality was a sad tour of a sparsely decorated warehouse which made children cry and prompted calls to the police. Posters, apparently AI-generated, advertised the event as an “encherining” experience replete with “cartchy tuns” — a veritable “pasadise of sweet teats”. Children were reportedly given a mere two jelly beans each and half a cup of lemonade.

The event starred a lethargic female oompa loompa running what many spectators have described as a meth lab, as well as “The Unknown,” a terrifying cloaked character in a silver mask with no relationship to the classic book that inspired the Glasgow show.

One Twitter user shrewdly observed that the event took place near an art school, and might be an art project skewering AI. “They chose willy wonka because that story itself is about people going somewhere they think will be wonderful and their expectations not meeting reality.” Behind the scenes: A missing Princess Kate is rumoured to have resurfaced in Glasgow.