Dolls are burnt during a domestic violence demo. Credit: CRISTINA QUICLER/AFP/Getty

Georgia Gabriel-Hooper was just 14 when she saw her mother, Cheryl, being shot dead through the window of her car by her stepfather. This was the culmination of seven years of abuse, threats and control.
Cheryl had always been “the life and soul of the party” before Andrew came along and won her over with his charm and intelligence. But almost as soon as the relationship began, Cheryl changed. “She was always very stressed and on edge,” Georgia says. “Every time they went out, she was always trying hard to put on a front. She was always having to make excuses for his behaviour. By the end, I didn’t really recognise my mum anymore.”
Georgia knew that her stepfather resented her. “I was just a piece of baggage that he had to put up with, but he gaslit and controlled me in just the same way as he did with mum,” she says. “I was boisterous, I was loud and I needed a lot of attention which he didn’t like. Mum was trying to keep me calm and keep him happy, which must have been a nightmare for her.”
Cheryl wanted to leave Hooper, says Georgia, but he had “tied up her finances”, made her “feel worthless” and left her completely dependent on him. But people knew what Hooper was like: “Locally, he was known for being aggressive and violent. He would go out and fight on nights out and get blind drunk.”
Cheryl increased her efforts to get away from Hooper after he started to turn violent. On one occasion he smashed in their television and opened his gun cabinet so that mother and daughter knew how serious he was about not letting them leave. “My mum was shaking so violently, it was horrible,” says Georgia. “She knew it was a threat that he would kill her. I was the one that pushed her to leave in the end.”
Cheryl and Georgia originally left Hooper in December 2017, although they returned for Christmas when Hooper threatened to kill himself. After they left again, Hooper started stalking Cheryl, phoning and texting constantly; he even fitted a tracker to Cheryl’s car. “He was driving around everywhere to find my mum, and told someone, ‘If I can’t have her, nobody will,’ says Georgia.
“I lived in dread for years,” says Georgia. “I knew he was capable of doing us both serious harm.”
Weeks later, Cheryl was dead and Georgia deeply traumatised.
“I had no support from specialist services after it happened,” says Georgia. “Absolutely none. As a family we had a little bit of help from Victim Support but nothing geared towards me as a child.” Yet she had lived for seven years with an abusive stepfather. Inevitably, Georgia “went down a dark path for a very long time”. She admits she turned to smoking and drinking when she was just 14. “I was incredibly lost.”
Domestic violence ruins lives: not just the women who are the victims, but also those poor children who are caught up in the crossfire.
Around 62% of children are present during domestic abuse incidents, and at least one in seven children will have lived with domestic violence by the time they reach 18. A recent report by Action for Children found that support for children affected by domestic abuse was “patchy, piecemeal and precarious”. And yet those children will carry what they have seen with them for the rest of their lives.
The effects can be devastating: girls are more likely to develop an eating disorder, or to harm themselves by taking overdoses or cutting themselves, and boys often learn the behaviour from the male abuser and begin to act out in violent and aggressive ways towards the mother.
Rachel Williams knows only too well the terrible toll it takes on children. In 2011, she was shot by her ex-husband Darren following months of stalking and harassment after she finally plucked up the courage to leave him due to extreme physical and emotional violence.
Tracking Rachel down to the hair salon where she worked, Williams fired two gunshots which hit her leg rather than her stomach as intended. Williams then turned the gun on himself.
Rachel’s son Jack, 16, who had lived with the abuse since he was two, went to stay with his paternal grandparents while his mother recovered in hospital. Rachel was surprised that Jack didn’t visit her, given how close they were, saying “he was like my shadow, wherever I was Jack was”. Instead of a visit, Rachel received angry texts from Jack blaming her for his father’s death. Then, six weeks after Rachel had been shot, Jack killed himself.
“Had Jack been given the support he needed when this happened, rather than just being told he was 16 so could live where he wanted, he would probably be alive today,” says Rachel. “Jack was very popular and outgoing. He had no problems at all with his mental health until the shooting. Jack was a victim of domestic abuse, not just a witness.”
Georgia, who went to live with her loving grandparents following her mother’s death, managed to stop abusing alcohol and turned a corner from a path of self-destruction by turning instead to campaigning to end domestic violence.
During the desperate 18-month wait for Hooper’s case to go to trial (he eventually was convicted of murder and sentenced to 31 years in prison), Georgia began researching people who’d been through similar situations and she found Rachel’s book: The Devil at Home.
Following her experiences, Rachel founded Stand Up to Domestic Abuse (SUTDA), mainly for those forgotten victims of domestic abuse: the children. “I was like a GP on call in those early days,” says Rachel, “and when a message came in on my Facebook page from Georgia, my heart went out to her.”
Rachel invited the then 15-year-old Georgia to attend a conference she was hosting which focused on domestic abuse survivors. It was there that I heard Georgia speak for the first time about the terrible events leading up to her mother’s death. “Looking back now I can see the signs of how his controlling behaviour became worse,” she said. “And because she was trying to leave the relationship he decided she was not going to be allowed to do that.”
The entire audience was profoundly moved by this young woman making sense of how domestic abuse entraps women and their children, and her rally cry for better understanding and provision for those affected.
“My mum was an incredibly strong character, and not someone you would see as a ‘typical victim’ as if there even is one,” says Georgia. “She gave me that little voice in the back of my head telling me, ‘You can’t let your mum down’.” It was important to change the narrative about who becomes a victim of domestic abuse: these women aren’t necessarily weak or complicit.
Women make up the vast majority of domestic abuse victims. Those most likely to be stalked and harassed, and to sustain serious injury are those who have ended (or attempted to end) a violent relationship. Each year, more than 100,000 people in the UK are at imminent risk of being murdered or seriously injured as a result of domestic abuse, with the risk increasing for those women that leave.
In England & Wales, more than 50,000 high-risk victims and 70,000 children are considered to be at “high risk” of serious harm, including homicide, by statutory agencies.
When PC Mike Taggart was 15, his mother Donna was murdered by her violent, alcoholic husband after she told him she wanted a divorce. “She was outgoing, warm and bubbly, but 11 years married to him changed her totally,” says Taggart. “It was constant belittling and misogynistic stuff.”
“He was dominant and aggressive to my sister and to me,” says Taggart. “We would do all we could to avoid him, including staying with friends every weekend. That was when he would get steaming drunk.” But it was impossible to escape the effects of living with domestic violence. “We walked on eggshells and would be dreading his next move.”
Taggart, who joined the police at a very young age, has focused on improving police practice regarding domestic abuse, and was awarded an MBE in 2021 for services to victims. He does his work not just with his mum in mind, but all the women and children in a similar situation. And there are so many.
The effects of not dealing with those children caught up in the crossfire of domestic violence and abuse is catastrophic. Numerous studies show that children who grow up with violence are at serious risk of long-term physical and mental health problems, such as chronic anxiety, addiction, depression, and self-harming.
But, in recent years, campaigners have lobbied to change the narrative from “witness” to “victim” when it comes to such children. Under a new law that came into force last year, children affected by domestic violence will finally be considered victims.
Given the numbers of women who suffer from domestic violence, the number of children growing up in a violent household is catastrophic. These children suffer quietly, desperately. They often do badly at school because the frightening experiences at home make it difficult to concentrate. Many refuse to go to school altogether, because they are too anxious to leave their mother alone with the abuser. Then there are those who simply cannot cope at all. So many children are prevented from leading fulfilling lives by witnessing such brutalisation.
Georgia doesn’t live in dread any more. But she can’t envisage a time when she will give up campaigning. “There is so much left to do. So many mothers have lost their lives, and there are countless children who have been left behind.” She’s positive about the new law. Those children may no longer be so easily forgotten.
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SubscribeRussia is not our enemy. China is not our enemy. However, those that argue that the United States of America is our friend and argue that more spending on weaponry is necessary are, most certainly, our enemy.
‘To be an enemy of the US can be dangerous, but to be a friend is fatal’. H Kissenger
Ludicrous. The EU leadership is clueless, inept, and they couldn’t lead 2 people out of an elevator. However, this did provide morning chuckles over breakfast!
Trump will probably target individual countries in Europe with selective tariffs. That’ll put the cat amongst the pigeons.
He might even offer the EU Commission a chance to choose between a major French product or a German product to receive the tariff. That would be fun to watch …
If China was a democracy I might agree. But to put advanced technology in the hands of an authoritarian government is a recipe for disaster in my opinion.
Similarly if the EU isolates itself from America, what of Europe’s imported fossil fuel dependencies since there is no way renewable energy is going to power increased domestic production.
Consequently, nuclear power is an absolute must for Europe if it is to bargain with the devil.
The reality is that global growth is stagnating because of the diminishing energy returns from energy invested. With increasing amounts of energy required to mine, extract, process the raw materials for energy production, less energy is available to the general economy. Thus AI and energy intensive data centres are dead on the ground without a revolution in energy production.
https://royalsocietypublishing.org/doi/10.1098/rsta.2022.0290#:~:text=Odum%20and%20Pinkerton%20agreed%20that,continuing%20uncertainties%2C%20research%20and%20applications.
In this respect, the demise of the EU is a direct product of incompetent energy policy which has resulted in much of Europe’s heavy industry exported abroad to BRICS aligned States.
Energy has to be the number one consideration both nationally and globally with perhaps the EU or Europe leading the way for a global treaty on energy production.
Encouraging the EU to turn towards China doesn’t sound that smart. It would just give Trump the justification to call Europe’s bluff and give the USA a reason to back away from NATO- which many American would like to do anyway.
Yes, tariffs are wrong for Europe too, but the EU is built upon tariffs. Doh!
More China is suicidal.
“Hey perhaps we’ll have to get a piece on Chagos.
– Starmer said no.
But the scandal is growing.
– Ok. Get Cottee onto it. The Chagos Islands aren’t Islands and they aren’t ours.
Sweet.”
To be clear and because you won’t read about this in Unherd. Hermer said in a recent speech he would welcome any international legal judgement that found against UK and he would act on it. Hermer who recently said the British Empire was wholly racist, in all its aspects.
Starmer and Herner are doing exactly this with regard to the Chagos Islands. Why is this not reported here?
We have a UK government that is acting against UK interests and justifying doing just that. It is without precedence in our history.
Unherd you cannot stay silent on this.
They are despicable! But perhaps things need to get worse before they get better. If Ted Heath had won re-election in 1974, there would have been no Maggie. Let these anti-British zealots do their worst, it will only give Reform a bigger majority and mandate in 2029 (see the utter destruction of the Dems in the states).
At some point there would have been a Maggie, because Heath was utterly inept. (Not quite as inept as T May, but damn close.) Or we would be Brussels Province 9 (in Receivership)
Boris ate a sandwich too close to someone, uproar in the media, and he was removed as PM and then barred from being an MP.
Starmer and friends act against British interests and laud themselves doing just that and not a peep from Unherd. What is going on?
“It is the surplus countries that have more to lose from a trade war.”
Europe has a very large surplus with the US, so I’m confused what the author is proposing. Surely the EU should look to balance its trade with developed western countries, which I believe, is what Trump is trying to achieve.
The Chagos Island 100 billion pound give away scandal deepens and deepens. All Starmer’s friends and colleagues are up to their necks in it.
Not a peep about this in Unherd (StarmerLies).
Excellent recommendations, but asking for the responses the author asks for is not realistic, because the people who currently govern Europe and the UK (and a sizable proportion of the populace don’t forget) have too much invested in their past stances to be able to change direction – to even actually see the need. Consequently all their actions going forward will all be… reactions.
It’s like asking a group of hindoos who has been going to the temple for thirty years to become atheists, because you now have proof that hindoos five thousand years ago did not have aeroplanes but were in fact living in mud huts – the (unconscious) sunk cost of your buy-in into the religion means very, very few people can actually see that the buy-in into nonsense is actually hurting you. There is no way round this problem except on the other side of penury.
Did you mean the EU when you said Europe ?
Maybe we should switch from producing cars at scale to producing tanks and military aircraft.
That’s really not a good idea. Joining an arms race is what got us into WW1. Much better to make it clear that anyone who attacks us will immediately be nuked. Then they’ll leave us alone.
“…The overall point is that there is a menu of effective responses, but they all require unity, and a bit of gumption…”
Errrrm… Gumption.
Yeah, sure.
https://youtu.be/axXaBO223RI?si=A5868OZZQbJvMXbj
By not concentrating on UK’s problems, not even naming them in this rag, how can they ever be resolved?
Put the UK first. Get some writers from rhe Right to propose solutions, practical steps to take. You are not a Starmer-Hermer puppet who prioritises other countries interests over ours. Or are you?
Your editorial policy is a mess. Sort yourself out
It is people like RL that UnHerd readers should cherish! You don’t have to respond – you know what to expect in return, something worthless and often unreadable.
Can you not see the stupidity of a writer saying ‘our commercial trade surpluses’ is an oxymoron in a UK based media outlet?
We are paying for this nonsense.
Get the basics right first Unherd.
Europe is not the EU. The EU is not Europe.
What a dismal, unprofessional rag you are.
Please do point us to your examples of higher quality journalism then.
UnHerd seems to me to be at the higher end of the quality spectrum, but I’m clearly missing something.
For me Unherd is a mess and very representative of the feebleness and cowardice of UK media in general.
Can you not get a refund?
And compensation for wasted time?
Trump would suggest a lawsuit for that.
If anyone wants to join me in a class action let me know here.
No thanks, I’m very happy with UnHerd.
I’m still waiting for your suggestions of better alternatives. I feel sure you’ve got some you’re hiding from us !
The Spectator then. But I unsubscribed when Gove took over there.
And yet you continue to come here, day after day after day, repeating the same boring nonsense. What a wasted life!
Not at all. It is good to clarify one’s thoughts and put them in order and down on paper.
You’re not missing anything PB; he’s flashing his knickers for us all to see, then telling us “not to look”.
When you talk of playing ‘our game’ it implies that ‘Europe’ or indeed the EU can speak as one and therein the fundamental conflict of self-interest among European states. The EU deceives itself by pretending there is a united European entity and therein the biggest obstacle to framing an effective response. The longer the myth is maintained the harder it will be to come to terms with reality.
The EU exists as a group of people in suits, discussing something they can’t control. It is not a federation. As soon as individual nations suffer, the people there will cease to be European. Europe does not exist in the same way as China, the USA and Russia.
… except in the minds of a few Lib Dems.
Sounds like a very risky strategy for the EU to adopt. If you want the US to leave NATO, then cosying up to China will probably achieve that quite quickly. The author should also note that the EU is not “Europe”, and should never be referred to in this way.
Hasn’t Trump threatened to leave NATO numerous times anyway? If so why not simply call his bluff.
For all Americas power, it still needs allies. Something Trump doesn’t seem to understand
I don’t understand it either. What use will Germany be in a world of disorder? Germany’s only threat is to stop sending cars to America and that’s hardly a threat. And Greece could stop American tourists having holidays. And Austria could stop skiing holidays. Not to mention Czechia, which could ban stag nights.
This was funny.
But when an ally becomes burdensome who needs it?
The US will likely never leave NATO because NATO is their tool, let’s not pretend otherwise. Even if they did, then only to cut the deadweight loose, though I’m not holding my breath on that.
The EU has destroyed it’s own prospects for an autonomous foreign policy by following the US into the Ukraine quagmire (because that is what it has become for the EU, regardless of the merits of the intervention itself) and for which it has nothing to show but another hole in the budget (Blackrock mopped up what little economic spoils there might be if you’re wondering).
Now it’s about to be bent over a barrel by Trump as a reward for their obsequiousness. On some level, I’ll enjoy watching them squirm, but that doesn’t make up for falling living standards if we’re being honest.
So I’m not sure this pivot to China could work, but blindly stumbling after the Americans isn’t working. The dolts at the commission might as well be ‘Muricas sleeper agents considering what they’ve done over the last 5 years. The Americans are looking out for themselves, the EU should too.
P.S. Im totally with you on the last point.
i suspect you are right that they wouldn’t leave completely. They may just reduce their $ contribution ….